Black Authors, Memoirs, Non-Fiction, race

Book Review: How To Say Babylon by Safiya Sinclair

“A book, I soon learned, was time travel. Each page held irrefutable power.”

Born and raised in Montego Bay, Jamaica, Sinclair tells us of her upbringing in a very strict Rastafarian household. She tells us the story of being under the thumb of her dad who was basically a Rastafarian zealot and lived in fear 24/7 that his family would be corrupted by the Western world. So much so, that he kept them away from other people, made them grow dreadlocks, made them dress modestly from head to toe and banned them from so many other things we would consider normal. On the flip side is her mom, who was so smart but so passive and was complicit in her dad’s choice on how to raise the kids. Sinclair walks us through from the very beginning to the point where she began to rebel and begin to discover life for herself.

“The bond between them was as unspoken and unbreakable as the barrier between us.”

Wow guys, not since Sex Cult Nun have I read a memoir that was this mind blowing. And to no one’s surprise, what the two have in common is – religion. Sinclair was able to write an impactful memoir because she understood where she came from. Earlier, when I said the book started from the very beginning it’s because she gave us the background of her parents and we get to understand their individual traumas and understand their motivations to how they became who they were – not that it excused it but we had some kind of context.

“I was still young enough to keep approaching him, a kicked dog slinking back, doing as my mother did.”

The writing style in which Sinclair wrote this book was so good and there was a heavy air of foreshadowing that had you on the edge of your seat as her father became more and more volatile. It almost felt like it was a thriller until you remembered that it is a true life story. The juxtaposition of her father getting more volatile and her mother getting more withdrawn was fascinating especially when you consider that the thing that saved her and her siblings was how gifted they were academically, which you could say they got from their mother. She made sure her kids were well educated and used it to their advantage. Though her mother was complicit in some areas, she definitely scrapped for her children.

“How would I know where to begin? Here, in the same hills that had made my father, now sprung the seed of my own rebellion.”

As fanatical as the dad was, the one thing that confused me was that he did not stop them from going to school and in fact was proud of her accolades even if it came from the Westerners he seemed to despise so much. Since the mom was a tutor, she could easily have home schooled them but Sinclair going to school revealed her poetry gifts which led to her expanding her views on the world and realizing that perhaps there was more than what her father had told her. I will say though, despite all the awfulness, something out there was looking out for Sinclair and her family because things always seemed to work out just at the right time.

“The bond between them was as unspoken and unbreakable as the barrier between us.”

With the way, the book ended it seems Sinclair wanted to focus on just her upbringing and how she broke out of the mindset. It would have been nice to know where the relationship with her dad ended up in detail and I was particularly interested in knowing how this affected her romantic relationships. But overall, this is a memoir that will stick with you for a long time. Besides just telling her story, I learned a lot about Rastafarianism, something I knew nothing about before this. You can tell how much she loves her home land as she described various parts of Jamaica in detail and with love. I am always in awe how people remember so much detail about their lives because I know personally, I remember certain stories in detail but for the most part they are hazy. Though tough at times, I recommend this book.

Taynement

Black Authors, Fiction, literary fiction, women's fiction

Book Review: Sugar,Baby by Celine Saintclare

“I think of Constance’s hushed voice whenever we were cleaning together. Once some things get dirty they can never be clean again and once some things are broken they can never be fixed.”

Agnes is a 21 year old black girl who lives at home with her religious immigrant mother, Constance, and her sister. Agnes is in limbo not knowing what to do with her life so in the meantime, she is cleaning houses with her mother. In between, she is sleeping with a guy who clearly isn’t interested in anything but her body and hanging out with her friend, Jess at clubs. One day, the daughter of one of their cleaning clients, Emily takes an interest in her and introduces her to the world of being a sugar baby. Agnes seems to have found the excitement she was looking for in her life. But as things begin to ramp up, she starts to wonder if it is worth it.

“I can admit it. It feels good to be wanted, to be delectable, delicious. But if I’ve learned anything it’s that I don’t want to be consumed. I have teeth of my own.”

I loved this book so much that I can’t believe it is not being spoken about in every corner of the literary world. This book took me into a world that is not my reality and made me understand Agnes’s decisions. Agnes is poor, doesn’t know what to do with her life and constantly having to endure her mom’s religious overzealousness. She is already sleeping with a no-good guy so what is the difference doing so with people who she is actually attracted to and getting paid for it especially when she wasn’t always sleeping with them?

What does it say about me that I enjoy this, sex with a man who doesn’t respect me whatsoever?

I enjoyed going through the journey with Agnes where she constantly straddled giving in to her lust and desires and hearing her mother’s voice. I also felt happy for her when she got to get all dolled up, visit places she had never been to and afford things for her sister. One of the best things about this book is SaintClare’s writing. It’s hard to believe it was a debut because it was so effortless.(SaintClare is 28). The story truly just flowed even though all the while I kept feeling “this can’t end well”. As Agnes’ journey grew more dangerous (to me) I kept hoping she would be okay as if I knew her personally. Her friendship with her friend, Jess was complicated and I couldn’t tell if SaintClare wanted us to view her as a good friend or a fairweather friend.

“It’s so deeply entrenched in me, the Fear of God, so much more strongly than the belief.”

It’s easy to reduce this book to just one about being a sugar baby but it had a lot more to it. It’s a journey of a young person trying to understand and find themselves, having a complicated relationship with their mother and friends and just trying to find a way out of poverty. There were other side stories which I found interesting as well and loads of graphic sex scenes. The author seems very knowledgeable and insightful about the world of being a sugarbaby which made this book even more interesting to read. If you couldn’t tell, I truly enjoyed this one and I definitely recommend it.

Taynement

Black Authors, Chick-Lit, Fiction, literary fiction, women's fiction

Book Review: This Could Be Us by Kennedy Ryan

“You accept a man shitting on you,” she used to say, “he’ll make himself at home. There’s no three strikes. You use me, take me for granted, you prove you don’t deserve to be in my life.”

Soledad has devoted her life to her family which consists of her husband, Edward and their three daughters. She is also a fantastic domestic goddess who excels in cooking, catering and planning. While going through a rough patch with her husband, things go from bad to worse when her life is upended by her husband’s choices and she has to rethink and restart her life from scratch. This includes trying to ignore the chemistry she has with a man her husband’s hates, Judah Cross. Judah is going through his own struggles trying to co-parent his autistic twins with his ex-wife, Tremaine. How long can these two ignore their feelings?

“Life is always gonna be complicated, but the good stuff is worth fighting for.”

First of all, this book goes against my usual reading style in that it is apparently part of the [Skyland] series (not a fan of series), which I didn’t know it was when I read the first book, Before I Let Go and some consider it a romance novel (not a fan of the genre). This is my second Kennedy Ryan book and I still don’t consider both books romance novels because the romance is not the center of the story. Much like the first book, I liked this one.

“A woman who wants more and realizes she deserves it is a dangerous thing”

The book centers around two characters that seem like very real people with real people problems. Soledad realizes that she wants more from her marriage and her life so far, and Judah has to learn how to let love in while being a caretaker to his twin boys on the spectrum, which in itself is a full time job. Which brings me to what Ryan does so well which is making her characters so real and relatable. Anyone familiar with dealing with loved ones on the spectrum will appreciate Ryan’s depiction of it (she has a son on the spectrum).

Ryan does such a good job of showing the time, care and expense involved with it. I also appreciated how even though they were twins, they had different manifestations of it. While Ryan never explicity mentioned it, I did like the insinuation that Judah himself is just realizing that he might also be on the spectrum.

“Can I be the love of my own life?”

I mentioned earlier how Ryan knows how to make characters real and one of my favorite parts is when Soledad, going through her confusion is going through her late mom’s things and finds a letter she wrote to herself and Soledad gets to see her mom as a woman and not a mom. Through that letter are pearls of wisdom that would be beneficial to anyone.

“When are we ever done working on ourselves? I believe wholeness is not a destination, but a lifetime process. Something that instead of waiting for, you could be living for.”

Once again, even with many threads, Ryan didn’t make it complicated. We get to still enjoy strong friendships, healthy co-parenting, teenage angst, romance and yep, she doesn’t skimp on the sex. I will say though, one of my gripes is that Judah Cross came off as too perfect. I am not sure I can recall any negatives of his and I don’t think that’s realistic. I definitely recommend this book and I am looking forward to the next one which will be Hendrix’s story.

Taynement