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Black Authors, celebrity memoir, Memoirs, race, women's fiction

Book Review: Leslie F*cking Jones by Leslie Jones

“You are with yourself every day, all day, all night—might as well like yourself.”

Leslie Jones is a comedian who is best known for her role on SNL for a couple of years. This memoir describes her life – from her childhood growing up in the South with a military father, her early high school and college days playing basketball, her early stand-up days driving from gig to gig and living from paycheck to paycheck to being cast on SNL which came because of a Chris Rock recommendation. I did this book on audio and I’m going to be reviewing this book on audio because I’m pretty sure this book on audio is very different from the printed book. For context, the printed book is 288 pages, the audio is 17 hours of Leslie just telling you, her story. It’s a long podcast filled with streams of consciousness and sometimes she even says – “I don’t think this was in the book but let me tell you about that time when…”.

“My talent can take me anywhere I want to go. I’m not conceited or cocky. I’m just convinced.”

I knew nothing about Leslie before I picked up this book. I’ve never heard any of her comedy and I don’t even watch SNL. I just know her as a public figure who was on SNL. So, I definitely went into this one completely blind about her story. Leslie grew up in the South with very young parents. Her parents got married when they were 18 and tried to do the best they could with what they had. Leslie’s ability to keep moving forward no matter what happened to her is very inspiring to listen to. She talks about her coming to the realization that she was black and a dark-skinned black girl at that and always asking her father if she was beautiful. She talks about hoping that her success will convince people who look like her to just keep going and that it gets better on the other side of being a grown up.

“I remember hearing Diana Ross once say, “Know who you are because if you don’t, they will make you what they want.”

Leslie is a very complicated person. There are a lot of things that I didn’t agree with, but I respect the fact that Leslie was always herself. Win or lose, she was always going to do it her own way and that takes a lot of courage to decide that who you are is enough. Did I listen to some of the stories and think she overreacted? Yes. Do I also think that it’s problematic that I think a dark-skinned black woman needs to tone it down? Absolutely. There is a lot of things living in America makes you internalize, and Leslie has internalized none of that. She tells you story after story of her trying to navigate her career – the things she did wrong and the things she got right. Consistently calling people out who she felt disrespected her because she’s a woman or because she’s black.

“I knew I wasn’t going to have children as far back as when as I was twelve. I am not a pain person. You’re telling me you’re going to pull a whole human out of my pussy? (For a start, I’m going to need more than six weeks off.) We saw a film in health class called something like The Beauty of Childbirth—but all I saw was hideous shit. What’s beautiful about snatching a baby out of a woman’s ass? The fuck? My cousin Rhonda even delivered a baby in our house, and I remember that there was so much blood…
None of this was going to happen to me.”

Leslie talks about her decision to not have kids. The abortions she had before going into planned parenthood for some much-needed sex education so that she could prevent getting pregnant. She was with one of her partners for a very long time and he wanted kids, but she was sure that if she stayed with him, she would be stuck and not achieve her dreams. Also, his mother hated her, and she got tired of the disrespect and left him. But as soon as she got pregnant the first time, she knew she was never going to be a mother. She knows that her mother would be disappointed about her decision to never have kids especially now that she has the resources to actually afford them but it’s a decision she made with clear eyes and has never regretted.

“He’s a grown-ass man. If you don’t watch out, you’re both gonna die—you’re both gonna sink in that same boat.”

Leslie talks about the complicated relationship she had with her father who wanted so bad for them to make something of themselves. She talks about her now deceased brother who was deep into selling crack during the crack epidemic in California. One of her regrets is that none of her family is here to reap the benefits of her success. As she describes her father, you get the feeling that she is hoping that her audience doesn’t judge him too harshly. She talks about how great he was when she was young and how he always told her she was gorgeous but also told her that she is a woman and black and she would have to fight hard to get anything in this world. You can tell that Leslie feels guilty that she chose herself unlike her brother who was stuck trying to take care of an alcoholic father. She was single minded in the pursuit of her career.

“The world’s not going to stop for that shit. This doesn’t define who you are. Don’t make this the focus of your life. There’s always going to be hurt before you get to the right place.”

All in all, I loved listening to this book, and it made me actually laugh out loud. So many times, I would stop and send Tayne a voicemail of something that I found incredibly funny. Like Leslie asking her therapist if she’s promiscuous because she was sexually abused when she was young and her therapist asking her if she’s considered that maybe she’s just a slut. It made me laugh so much because Leslie was like – you know what? you’re right. Anyway, I recommend this book and wish Leslie Jones continued success in all her endeavors. I gave this book 4 stars on Goodreads.

Leggy

Chick-Lit, dystopian, Fantasy, literary fiction, Magical Realism, romance, women's fiction

Book Review: The Husbands by Holly Gramazio

“You can’t stay married to someone forever just because they climb out of your attic one afternoon.”

Lauren returns to her flat in London late one night to be greeted by her husband, Michael. There is only one problem – she’s not married. She’s never seen Michael in her life. But according to her neighbors, friends and family, this is her husband, they’ve been together for years. As Lauren tries to make sense of this situation, Michael goes up the attic to change the bulb. In his place, a new man emerges from the attic and a slightly altered life re-forms around her. Realizing that her attic is creating an infinite supply of husbands, Lauren has to decide what truly matters to her in a man. How do you decide to stick with what you currently have if there is a chance that better could be coming down from the attic? When do you stop trying to get better?

“She has always thought of her willingness to go along with things, her outsourcing of decisions to friends and circumstance, as passivity, not courage. But observed and described by this man she likes so much, she can almost believe in herself as someone with an audacious spirit.”

This book was my pick for Book of the Month in April and the description intrigued me. When I finally picked it up, it was a fast but exhausting read. Reading Lauren continuously go through man after man was insane. It tired me out. I can’t even begin to imagine what Lauren felt living it. I think Gramazio achieved what she set out to do with this book. I also found the attic to be a metaphor for dating apps or dating in general, when do you decide to settle with good enough? Is there always going to be better? When do you make a decision and stick to it and see how far that decision takes you and your partner until it ends, or it doesn’t? If you can switch out men for eternity, what determines when you stop?

“In the years before the first husband emerged from the attic, she had felt the burden of long singleness lying upon her. Being happy to be single had felt obligatory, a statement of feminism or autonomy or just a way to head off coupled friends who she didn’t want feeling sorry for her. The weight of that requirement had made it difficult, sometimes, to figure out how she really felt.”

Another thing I loved that Gramazio demonstrated was the autonomy of the other person to also decide to not be with you. Even though, Lauren sent man after man back into attic, there were men that she thought she could be with who unknowingly went back to the attic and out came a completely new person. In the end, it wasn’t just up to Lauren to make a decision, you can make a decision and the other person can decide that they don’t want you or life happens, and the relationship just doesn’t work out. Even when Lauren decides to stop exchanging the men, the men had to make the decision to also stick with her and also the attic kept luring them back in.

“She’s chosen her husband. She hasn’t met him, but she’s chosen him. And if he’s not right, she’ll get out of it the old-fashioned way: an immense pile of onerous legal chores that wear her down over the course of many months, and a determination to keep it cordial that ultimately collapses over a missing vase that they both fixate on as a metaphor for their mutual failings.”

Ultimately, this book ended the best way it could have possibly ended. I understood the choice the author made to end it in the way that she did, and I quite appreciated the ending. By the time I got to the end though, I was so tired of reading this book because I was worn down by the many, many men and how quickly they came and went. We never got to know any intimately. All in all, I enjoyed this book and recommend it. I gave it 3 stars on Goodreads.

Have you read this book? Did you enjoy it? Let me know in the comments.

Leggy

Black Authors, Memoirs, Non-Fiction, race

Book Review: How To Say Babylon by Safiya Sinclair

“A book, I soon learned, was time travel. Each page held irrefutable power.”

Born and raised in Montego Bay, Jamaica, Sinclair tells us of her upbringing in a very strict Rastafarian household. She tells us the story of being under the thumb of her dad who was basically a Rastafarian zealot and lived in fear 24/7 that his family would be corrupted by the Western world. So much so, that he kept them away from other people, made them grow dreadlocks, made them dress modestly from head to toe and banned them from so many other things we would consider normal. On the flip side is her mom, who was so smart but so passive and was complicit in her dad’s choice on how to raise the kids. Sinclair walks us through from the very beginning to the point where she began to rebel and begin to discover life for herself.

“The bond between them was as unspoken and unbreakable as the barrier between us.”

Wow guys, not since Sex Cult Nun have I read a memoir that was this mind blowing. And to no one’s surprise, what the two have in common is – religion. Sinclair was able to write an impactful memoir because she understood where she came from. Earlier, when I said the book started from the very beginning it’s because she gave us the background of her parents and we get to understand their individual traumas and understand their motivations to how they became who they were – not that it excused it but we had some kind of context.

“I was still young enough to keep approaching him, a kicked dog slinking back, doing as my mother did.”

The writing style in which Sinclair wrote this book was so good and there was a heavy air of foreshadowing that had you on the edge of your seat as her father became more and more volatile. It almost felt like it was a thriller until you remembered that it is a true life story. The juxtaposition of her father getting more volatile and her mother getting more withdrawn was fascinating especially when you consider that the thing that saved her and her siblings was how gifted they were academically, which you could say they got from their mother. She made sure her kids were well educated and used it to their advantage. Though her mother was complicit in some areas, she definitely scrapped for her children.

“How would I know where to begin? Here, in the same hills that had made my father, now sprung the seed of my own rebellion.”

As fanatical as the dad was, the one thing that confused me was that he did not stop them from going to school and in fact was proud of her accolades even if it came from the Westerners he seemed to despise so much. Since the mom was a tutor, she could easily have home schooled them but Sinclair going to school revealed her poetry gifts which led to her expanding her views on the world and realizing that perhaps there was more than what her father had told her. I will say though, despite all the awfulness, something out there was looking out for Sinclair and her family because things always seemed to work out just at the right time.

“The bond between them was as unspoken and unbreakable as the barrier between us.”

With the way, the book ended it seems Sinclair wanted to focus on just her upbringing and how she broke out of the mindset. It would have been nice to know where the relationship with her dad ended up in detail and I was particularly interested in knowing how this affected her romantic relationships. But overall, this is a memoir that will stick with you for a long time. Besides just telling her story, I learned a lot about Rastafarianism, something I knew nothing about before this. You can tell how much she loves her home land as she described various parts of Jamaica in detail and with love. I am always in awe how people remember so much detail about their lives because I know personally, I remember certain stories in detail but for the most part they are hazy. Though tough at times, I recommend this book.

Taynement

Black Authors, Fiction, literary fiction, women's fiction

Book Review: Sugar,Baby by Celine Saintclare

“I think of Constance’s hushed voice whenever we were cleaning together. Once some things get dirty they can never be clean again and once some things are broken they can never be fixed.”

Agnes is a 21 year old black girl who lives at home with her religious immigrant mother, Constance, and her sister. Agnes is in limbo not knowing what to do with her life so in the meantime, she is cleaning houses with her mother. In between, she is sleeping with a guy who clearly isn’t interested in anything but her body and hanging out with her friend, Jess at clubs. One day, the daughter of one of their cleaning clients, Emily takes an interest in her and introduces her to the world of being a sugar baby. Agnes seems to have found the excitement she was looking for in her life. But as things begin to ramp up, she starts to wonder if it is worth it.

“I can admit it. It feels good to be wanted, to be delectable, delicious. But if I’ve learned anything it’s that I don’t want to be consumed. I have teeth of my own.”

I loved this book so much that I can’t believe it is not being spoken about in every corner of the literary world. This book took me into a world that is not my reality and made me understand Agnes’s decisions. Agnes is poor, doesn’t know what to do with her life and constantly having to endure her mom’s religious overzealousness. She is already sleeping with a no-good guy so what is the difference doing so with people who she is actually attracted to and getting paid for it especially when she wasn’t always sleeping with them?

What does it say about me that I enjoy this, sex with a man who doesn’t respect me whatsoever?

I enjoyed going through the journey with Agnes where she constantly straddled giving in to her lust and desires and hearing her mother’s voice. I also felt happy for her when she got to get all dolled up, visit places she had never been to and afford things for her sister. One of the best things about this book is SaintClare’s writing. It’s hard to believe it was a debut because it was so effortless.(SaintClare is 28). The story truly just flowed even though all the while I kept feeling “this can’t end well”. As Agnes’ journey grew more dangerous (to me) I kept hoping she would be okay as if I knew her personally. Her friendship with her friend, Jess was complicated and I couldn’t tell if SaintClare wanted us to view her as a good friend or a fairweather friend.

“It’s so deeply entrenched in me, the Fear of God, so much more strongly than the belief.”

It’s easy to reduce this book to just one about being a sugar baby but it had a lot more to it. It’s a journey of a young person trying to understand and find themselves, having a complicated relationship with their mother and friends and just trying to find a way out of poverty. There were other side stories which I found interesting as well and loads of graphic sex scenes. The author seems very knowledgeable and insightful about the world of being a sugarbaby which made this book even more interesting to read. If you couldn’t tell, I truly enjoyed this one and I definitely recommend it.

Taynement

Fiction, Mystery, thriller

Book Review: The Housemaid by Freida McFadden

Millie, a recent parolee, who is homeless and jobless is desperate to find a job to stay within the conditions of her parole. Desperate, she interviews for a maid position at the Winchesters and is shocked when she gets the job. She wonders how her time in prison and why she was in prison didn’t come up when they ran her background check but nevertheless she is so happy to finally have a job and a place to stay. As she becomes enscounsed into the life of the Winchesters especially the wife, Nina, she wonders how such a perfect man ended up with such a crazy wife. As Nina constantly gaslights and scares Millie, she realizes that all might not be as it looks.

I had this book on my to-be-read list for 2 years before I finally read it on a flight to Arizona. I started it at the airport waiting for my flight and finished it as the plane touched down in Phoenix. This was a very compelling book and easy to read. I knew where it was going because certain characters were just too good to be true. But, even though I knew what the author was going to do at the end, it did not reduce my enjoyment of this book. I really enjoyed the interactions between Nina and Millie. I found the PTA portions of the book to be so well written and fascinating. The first 85% of this book were quite intriguing but once you hit the last 30 pages, then you have to utterly suspend all logic and just enjoy ride.

It’s really hard to review a mystery book without giving away the twist but I think you should pick this one up if you’re looking for a book that would definitely hold your interest and that you can read in one sitting. There’s a second book in the series but I’m hesitant about picking it up since I now know the formula and the author continues with the same protagonist, Millie.

I gave this book 3 stars on Goodreads. Let me know if you’ve read this one.

Leggy

Book Related Topics, Chick-Lit, Fiction, romance, women's fiction

Book Review: Funny Story by Emily Henry

“The same universe that dispassionately takes things away can bring you things you weren’t imaginative enough to dream up.”

Daphne is engaged to Peter and a couple of weeks before their wedding, he comes back from his bachelor’s party and tells her that he is in love with his best friend, Petra. Peter and Petra jet off for a holiday and gives Daphne one week to leave the house Peter bought for their future life together, a house that she has put her all into decorating. Stranded in beautiful Waning Bay, Michigan, without friends or family but with a dream job as a children’s librarian, she decides to become roommates with the only person who understands her predicament – Miles Nowak, Petra’s ex-boyfriend.

“You can’t force a person to show up, but you can learn a lesson when they don’t”

Emily Henry is a must read/buy author for me. I look forward to every book from her and she churns out very dependable rom coms. This used to be Jasmine Guillory for me but she hasn’t published a standalone book in a while, so I pivoted to Henry. I’ve reviewed every book of hers on this blog so just search her name and decide where you’d like to start. My favorite book of hers is Book Lovers but Funny Story comes pretty close. The characters are people you want to root for. Daphne and Miles were perfectly flawed in the way you’d want your romantic characters to be.

“I’m a cynic. And a cynic is a romantic who’s too scared to hope.”

Miles might be the best book boyfriend Henry has ever created. If he was secretly a millionaire then we would have been off to the races but alas, he doubles as both a server and a buyer for a Michigan winery. I don’t even know if this job is possible but I digress. Daphne is a librarian. I think I’m just a sucker for female characters created by Henry who work in the book industry in any capacity. Miles tries to convince Daphne to stay in Michigan even though the reason she moved to Michigan has ended, so he takes her on a series of “dates” over a couple of Sundays to show her how beautiful Michigan is. I was utterly convinced by Miles about the beauty of Michigan that I thought about going there for my birthday in September.

“It’s easy to be loved by the ones who’ve never seen you fuck up. The ones you’ve never had to apologize to, and who still think all your ‘quirks’ are charming.”

Emily Henry is a really good writer and if you like good books in general, then you should please give her a go. Now, if you love really good rom coms you should absolutely pick up her books. I read this book in a couple of hours after I picked it up at Barnes and Noble the weekend it came out. I gave this book 4 stars on Goodreads.

Have you read this one? Did you enjoy it?

Leggy

Fiction, literary fiction

Book Review: What Happened To Ruthy Ramirez by Claire Jimenez

“We were not that kind of family, the type who spoke politely to each other about where and how we were in pain.”

In 1996, Ruthy Ramirez never makes it home from school. Twelve years later, her two sisters, Nina and Jessica are watching a reality TV show, “Catfight” which can basically be described like the real life show, “Bad Girls Club”. They see a girl called Ruby and are convinced that it is their sister. Ruby has red hair like Ruthy, a birth mark below her eyes like Ruthy and she is also from Staten Island. Same place they are from.

They hatch up a plan to stake out the Catfight house and confirm that Ruby is indeed Ruthy. Their mother, Dolores finds out about it and includes herself and her friend in the quest and the story goes back in time and gives us the POV of how Ruthy’s dissapearance affected each of them in different ways.

“Besides, you can only sympathize so long for somebody else’s loss before you run out of encouraging things to say.”

When I finished this book, one of my descriptions was that it was an easy read and I immediately felt like I had to take this back because though I found it to be a quick and easy read, it does touch on sexual assault and loss and that won’t be an easy read for everyone. Ramirez did a good job of making the characters real. You really felt like this Puerto Rican family were your family friends. Immigrant families would recognize some elements like family expectations, duties, religious mothers etc.

“Sometimes it feels like the three of us are still stuck in that car. Shouting out Ruthy’s name into the unanswering dark.”

While we get the POV from the sisters and mom, it felt like the main voice was Nina’s and she was a competent narrator. Part of what Jimenez does is take us into their mindset then and now. So we get to feel Nina’s unhappiness at her life at the moment and Jess’s home life with a baby. That being said, I felt like I could feel the hole that Ruthy left. Speaking of Ruthy, I liked that she was included in the POVs and we get to know her life before she disappeared. We learn Ruthy wasn’t an angel and had her own fiery personality.

And it seemed to me then, and still does now, that I could have become a completely different girl, a completely different woman, if Ruthy had never gone.”

I’ve seen a lot of people complain about the amount of curse words being used and I am so confused as to why this is even a thing. It’s 2024 and I assume it is adults reading this book, why is it a big deal? Anyways, I do recommend this book because I think the real story is more about following the story of a family who is still dealing with losing a family member many years later and are faced with a glimmer of hope. Another reason I liked this was that we actually get closure for Ruthy’s story and it is not one of those books where there is a vague ending where the interpretation is left to the reader.

Taynement

Uncategorized

Book Review: A Love Song For Ricki Wilde by Tia Williams

A Love Song for Ricki Wilde by Tia Williams | Hachette Book Group

“And know this: the villain depends on who’s telling the story.”

The Wilde family are a wealthy and influential family in Atlanta and all the daughters are expected to be on their best behavior at all times and join the family funeral home business. But Ricki has always been different. Impulsive, wild and matching to the beat of her own drum she often causes her family, embarrassment. Ricki doesn’t want to join the family business and instead wants to pursue being a florist. A chance encounter leads her to live out her dream in Harlem, NY. One night she sees a man in the garden and her life is changed forever.

“But identity changes all the time, I’ve found. There’s a few more ‘you’ you haven’t met yet.”

I was feeling where this book was going and prepared to dive into Ricki’s life then the book veered into magical realism, which I guess is the in thing now and then I was a little thrown off. The man Ricki sees in the garden is Ezra and he has a secret that he doesn’t want to share with Ricki. He eventually does and their love story goes into overdrive. This is my third book by Williams where my mind wasn’t blown. The Perfect Find (which was turned into a Netflix movie) and Seven Days In June were enjoyable and I know most people liked it but for me they were just okay and I feel the same way about this book.

“I’ve seen beautiful things and terrible things. Until you, I didn’t know that they’re two sides of the same feeling. I want you, Ricki. Actually, it’s not a want. It’s an uncompromising, inconvenient need. But it’ll ruin us both.”

Listen, the writing was good. The idea in all honesty is good and kind of unique so I admit that it’s a case of something not being for you. Especially someone who isn’t really into romance and struggles with magical realism. BUUUUT, if you are not like me, I think you would like this. Ezra and Ricki’s romance is legit whirlwind and heady and Williams writes their love scenes as such – very intense. You get a good feel for the secondary characters, Ricki’s immediate family. They don’t feature much but they do their part of letting you learn more about why Ricki is the way she is. Same goes for Ms. Della, her adopted grandmother. I also appreciated the history and culture lesson on Harlem and it was nice imagining the good times black people had in those times.

Anyways, I wish the book had focused on what it wanted to be. Either a romance novel or a mystical thriller because putting it all together, neither of them shined. I enjoyed Ricki as a character, even if she was chaotic. Ezra came off as too perfect and you know how I feel about those. Ultimately, the magical realism turned me off of it so once again, if that is something you enjoy, don’t listen to me and go ahead and give it a shot.

Taynement

Fiction, literary fiction, Magical Realism, romance

Book Review: Shark Heart by Emily Habeck

“Wren saw now how passion was delicate and temporary, a visitor, a feeling that would come and go. Feelings fled under pressure; feelings did not light the darkness. What remained strong in the deep, the hard times, was love as an effort, a doing, a conscious act of will. Soulmates, like her and Lewis, were not theoretical and found. They were tangible, built.”

Few weeks after Lewis and Wren get married, Lewis gets a rare diagnosis. He’s going to slowly turn into a shark while retaining all his memories and consciousness. As Lewis develops the impulses, features and appetite of a great white shark, he struggles to figure out what his future will be like and what life awaits him when he’s released into the ocean. Wren takes a break from her job to fully care for Lewis while trying to figure out a way for them to still be together after Lewis is a shark. This transformation triggers Wren’s memories of her own mother’s change into a reptile and how she went from the best, loving mother to someone Wren had to take care of and escape from.

“All the hours he spent theorizing about magic seemed so naive now. The main ingredient in transformation was not magic, it was pain.”

When I first started this book, I thought the transformation thing was an allegorical way to talk about the many changes people go through in long term relationships but as I read the last page of this book, I just thought: Wow, this was really just literally about people turning into animals. Yes, I know that it is still a metaphor for relationship strains and ills but Emily Habeck really writes it like she means it literally. The writer really did pull this off. I can’t believe someone agreed to publish this book as a debut work. The author still manages to explore the nuances of change even within such an outrageous premise and after a couple of chapters you ignore the fact that the premise is in fact ridiculous and just get really into the characters.

“Plants were probably the most sentient of all living things: rational, bloodless bystanders, witnessing the great horror of it all.”

Told in alternating timelines, this book explores the past, present and where both timelines meet. The writer tells this story with such beautiful language and unique structure that it was hard to tear myself from this book. This is such a tender look at how such a diagnosis absolutely devastates a happy couple and it is an exploration of all the lives we lead that brings us into the people we are presently and how that present life will lead us into the people we will become in the future.

“Wren no longer sees life as a long, linear ladder with a beginning, middle, and end. Instead, she considers how life is like a spiraling trail up a mountain. Each circling lap represents a learning cycle, the same lesson at a slightly higher elevation. Wren realizes she likes to rest as much as she likes to climb. She begins to enjoy the view.”

The chapters are short and sweet and never more than 4 pages. Some chapters are written in stanzas or are a couple of sentences. The first part of this book deals with Wren and Lewis as they deal with the diagnosis, the second part takes us back to Wren’s mother’s life before and after her own diagnosis and the third part brings us back to the present day. The middle part where we explore Wren’s mother’s diagnosis and life is really such a great way to talk about intergenerational trauma. Wren’s mother, Angela, tries so hard to be a different mother from the one she had but ends up being diagnosed with a reptile mutation that she becomes unwillingly the monster that her own mother was.

“In the rare hopeful hour, I tell myself this darkness has a purpose: to help me recognize light if I ever find it again.”

Even though I really enjoyed this book, I ended up giving it 4 stars because it dragged in the middle once it left Lewis and Wren’s point of view and it tied up a little too neatly for my taste. I still recommend this book because it contains such great writing and has all the heart a story needs to be amazing. I can’t wait to read what Emily Habeck comes up with in the future.

Leggy

Black Authors, Chick-Lit, Fiction, literary fiction, women's fiction

Book Review: This Could Be Us by Kennedy Ryan

“You accept a man shitting on you,” she used to say, “he’ll make himself at home. There’s no three strikes. You use me, take me for granted, you prove you don’t deserve to be in my life.”

Soledad has devoted her life to her family which consists of her husband, Edward and their three daughters. She is also a fantastic domestic goddess who excels in cooking, catering and planning. While going through a rough patch with her husband, things go from bad to worse when her life is upended by her husband’s choices and she has to rethink and restart her life from scratch. This includes trying to ignore the chemistry she has with a man her husband’s hates, Judah Cross. Judah is going through his own struggles trying to co-parent his autistic twins with his ex-wife, Tremaine. How long can these two ignore their feelings?

“Life is always gonna be complicated, but the good stuff is worth fighting for.”

First of all, this book goes against my usual reading style in that it is apparently part of the [Skyland] series (not a fan of series), which I didn’t know it was when I read the first book, Before I Let Go and some consider it a romance novel (not a fan of the genre). This is my second Kennedy Ryan book and I still don’t consider both books romance novels because the romance is not the center of the story. Much like the first book, I liked this one.

“A woman who wants more and realizes she deserves it is a dangerous thing”

The book centers around two characters that seem like very real people with real people problems. Soledad realizes that she wants more from her marriage and her life so far, and Judah has to learn how to let love in while being a caretaker to his twin boys on the spectrum, which in itself is a full time job. Which brings me to what Ryan does so well which is making her characters so real and relatable. Anyone familiar with dealing with loved ones on the spectrum will appreciate Ryan’s depiction of it (she has a son on the spectrum).

Ryan does such a good job of showing the time, care and expense involved with it. I also appreciated how even though they were twins, they had different manifestations of it. While Ryan never explicity mentioned it, I did like the insinuation that Judah himself is just realizing that he might also be on the spectrum.

“Can I be the love of my own life?”

I mentioned earlier how Ryan knows how to make characters real and one of my favorite parts is when Soledad, going through her confusion is going through her late mom’s things and finds a letter she wrote to herself and Soledad gets to see her mom as a woman and not a mom. Through that letter are pearls of wisdom that would be beneficial to anyone.

“When are we ever done working on ourselves? I believe wholeness is not a destination, but a lifetime process. Something that instead of waiting for, you could be living for.”

Once again, even with many threads, Ryan didn’t make it complicated. We get to still enjoy strong friendships, healthy co-parenting, teenage angst, romance and yep, she doesn’t skimp on the sex. I will say though, one of my gripes is that Judah Cross came off as too perfect. I am not sure I can recall any negatives of his and I don’t think that’s realistic. I definitely recommend this book and I am looking forward to the next one which will be Hendrix’s story.

Taynement